A Hallmark-Like "E-Card" for Post-Abortion Women -- One of Two

Editor's note. If you have any comments on Part One or Part Two, please send them to daveandrusko@hotmail.com.

I first heard about "Exhale" when I read "Is There a Post-Abortion Syndrome?," a scorching hatchet job on Crisis Pregnancy Centers that ran in the New York Times Magazine the day before the 34th commemoration of the noxious Roe w. Wade decision. Located at 4exhale.org, Exhale bills itself as the "country's first and only nationwide non-judgmental after-abortion talkline."

Exhale's mission, found at the bottom of its press release, "is to create a social climate where each person's unique experience with abortion is supported, respected and free from stigma." Indeed, removing abortion's "stigma" is clearly at the top of the organization's agenda.

According to Emily Bazelon's piece in the Times, the web page is run by Aspen Baker, who had an abortion at 23. "She favors abortion rights, but her aim is to counsel women without taking sides in the debate," wrote Brazelon. (See more about that below!) The site receives an average of 300 calls a month.

Baker's attempt to crank up the volume of calls and enjoy her 15 minutes in the sun began yesterday, the day after she sent out a press release announcing the availability of "ALL NEW After-Abortion Greeting Cards: A New Way to Acknowledge, Respect and Support After-Abortion Experiences." The release helpfully lists the email address of the designer of the six "e-cards."

According to the Associated Press's Lisa Lieff, 'The inspiration for the project came in part from a longtime abortion provider who frequently observed there were no Hallmark cards for abortion." And there is something for everyone.

The e-cards "focus on a variety of themes such as religion, thinking of you, spirituality, sympathy, and encouragement," according to the press release. "The e-cards are an immediate, tangible way for people to show their support for loved ones who have had a personal experience with abortion."

Having read the cards, viewed them online, and talked with two women who have had abortions, let me offer a few thoughts. The card that reminds women, "God will never leave you or forsake you" could be an important affirmation at a time of tremendous turmoil and tragedy. Likewise, "Healing is possible" can shore up a woman who may be convinced that she has committed the unpardonable sin.

Others, by strong contrast, are almost congratulatory, interpreting the decision to abort as a tribute to a woman's strength and wisdom. "I think you're strong, smart, thoughtful and caring," goes one celebratory e-card. "I believe in you and your ability to make the best decision. I think you did the right thing."

As always, the wider context is crucial to understanding what's at work. Bazelon's piece concedes that pro-life ("anti-abortion") groups have undertaken virtually all the post-abortion counseling work to date at the same time she criticizes them for exaggerated (when not wholly fabricated) weaknesses.

In addition to Exhale, there is also an Oregon-based group by the name of "Backline," which is explicitly a "pro-choice post-abortion" support group, according to Bazelon's story. Its founder laments that she doesn't have the resources to fill what she argues is "a demand for pro-choice post-abortion support groups and retreats."

A friend who also visited the web page pointed out something I had missed, which is found under the "After-Abortion Resources" link. In the most excruciatingly convoluted language, the reader is to understand that for "many women," being diagnosed as having Post-Abortion Stress Syndrome (being able to give what they are feeling a "name") can be experienced as "positive and affirming," even "empowering." But that doesn't mean "you have a major psychological condition that requires medical care." This diminishes and vastly underplays what many women experience after they violate their own consciences.

But that attitude makes perfect sense when you read their "core values" section. It includes this revealing statement of their basic outlook: "Exhale believes abortion can be a normal part of the reproductive lives of women and girls."

Groups such as Exhale and Backline are vitally important to pro-abortionists, increasingly aware they need to refurbish their justly-deserved image of total indifference to women who suffer after their abortions. Exhale argues it is non-judgmental. In fact, it shores up the core message of "pro-choicers": moral equivalency. Life or death--six of one, half-dozen of the other.

But their entanglement is also more direct. If you look at Exhale's board of directors, National Advisory Council, and Partners & Donors, you find a virtual who's who of the Abortion Establishment, including Planned Parenthood, the National Abortion Federation, and "Catholics for a Free Choice," to name only three.

"Non-judgmental" e-cards are just the first step in the attempt to "normalize" abortion. According to Lisa Lieff's AP story, "The cards, offered in English and Spanish, are part of a broader effort by Baker, who launched Exhale in January 2002, to bring the agency's work into a broader arena. In two weeks, the agency plans to publish a magazine featuring stories, poems, letters and rituals by and for women who have had abortions.

"'We designed them to deal with different peoples' response to abortion. Not everyone is grieving their loss. Not everyone has a relationship with God. Not everyone thinks it is the best thing,' Baker said. 'We hope the people who send them take the time to think not only about the message they want to send, but about what is best for the person receiving it and what they need to hear.'"

Personally, I think the most revealing remark came in this sentence found in the AP story.

"Although greeting card offerings have expanded in recent years to include such milestones as divorce, potty-training and half-birthdays, Baker said she was unaware of anyone else providing after-abortion cards online."